No Warm Memories

If you thought that I might have not recovered from the mental and physical fatigue of deleting all the ridiculing comments of Anonymous people on my blog and must have gone into hibernation mode, then sorry guys, you are mistaken, I am back to haunt you all, and Yes I will still keep pinging you all on Facebook and Gtalk with the URL of my posts till you actually view it ( *fire coming out of my eyeballs and venom in my verse* :P ). I am sure even Hitler must have shied away had he witnessed people in such agonizing pain, well for once the fact; “A pen is mightier than a Sword” makes sense to me. 

Apparently, after the last post I wasn’t so keen on causing the same mental trauma again; I’d thought I had bludgeoned away your wits with my last write up, so I started reading a book, but the intensity of cold just didn’t let me do it, it’s so hard turning the leaves of the book with gloves on, and even if you don’t wear them, who in the hell would want to take out hands from inside the blanket ( stop your creativity there only, that’s where my hands actually rest ) just to turn a page, so I gave up on that task.

The dipping mercury has definitely made tasks appear rather grueling, In order to get ready for a class at 10, alarms of 9:50 don’t actually work, it definitely takes time to fit that tiny sweater (knit with an idea to be worn above a single layer) over 4-5 layers of clothes, and add to that those never ending body spraying sessions and you’re way past your class time.  And if you are crazy enough to think what happens if the classes are at 8, then please do a favor to yourself and shut this tab, coz just like the text you read, the one that is going to follow is not going to make any sense to you.

Trust me one of these 'Multilayered' people walked past the television in the cafeteria, and I missed an entire session of play of the Sydney test; these people are like an entire 'Wardrobe in Motion'. You have two or more of these in a class and I am sure you’ll have space issues, and add to that the fragrance of naphthalene balls oozing out of them, People who try and cover this odor with some fancy perfumes, let me tell you, they are as useful as a one legged man in an arse kicking contest.

Some people are already blaming the winters for the slow net speeds too, I overheard a guy shouting at the peak of his voice, "Itni thand hai saala electron bhi jam gya hai taar mein, net chalega kaise!!! ”

The winters have affected the business sector too, at the same time when the 'Chai wala' and the 'Andey wala' are making paranormal profits; the winters seem to have taken its toll on the poor Tanki wala ( For the newbies, Tanki is nothing but a fancy name given to an AREA-51 like location, used to carry out covert operations. Definition by FNT). The Tanki has reported fewest visitors in a single week ever since its erection; the sheet of Fog giving the people the option to choose from a gamut of options denies the Tanki of its exclusivity. But as soon as the winters get over, you know where the people will be heading.

Even the pet shops have taken a hit and are reporting huge losses, “People aren’t really looking forward to domesticating the regular animals, they want species which can survive the cold, they want Penguins now”, said Mr. Naman gupta, a local pet keeper.

The cold breeze blowing at high velocities left some hostlers in tears, as it swept away their clothes from the balcony, posing bigger worries for students  gearing up for placement sessions. “That was my dad’s shirt, the one in which he got promoted and the one which got him increments, how am I gonna answer him !! I can handle the interviewer but not him, NO shirt means NO promotion and NO extra money, how are we gonna survive the financial crunch!!! ”

I wish I could’ve continued this post, but the need to give my fingers the warmth of my pockets won’t let me do that, seems like your prayers have been answered.

P.S. This post was written while knitting myself a pair of woolly underpants. Please don’t unsubscribe from my blog after reading this post, I promise better posts in future. I love my readers.